flashback...Blind Date Guy ver 1.0

OK, since I haven't been on a decent date in ages, I have decided to dust the cobwebs off some of my previous dating stories and share them on this blog. Yes, my bad dating history is extensive and dates back for years.

Back in Chicago, I was set up on a blind date with a guy by a mutual friend. All I knew about him was that he was over six foot tall and worked in TV news (not on camera). Our date started with cocktails at Rock Bottom, killing time before our dinner reservation at 9pm at Green Dolphin. So we're sitting at the bar having our first drink when a bunch of guys at the other end of the bar walk over, maneuver between us, and start trying to guess my ethnic background (This happens to me a lot...I'm pretty sure it's just a cheesy way for guys to approach me, but the dialogue gets old fast. They never guess Filipino. How can that be?!?). Anyhoo, these randoms just keep chatting it up. I tell them I'm on a date, introduce said date, but they still hang around. By now my date has been pushed about 4 chairs down as the randoms have made themselves comfortable.

One of the randoms (we'll call him Stalker Boy) asks me out. As I make note of the rather large, gaudy wedding ring he's sporting, I inform him that I'm on a date and he's married. I guess these were technicalities for him. I make small talk with Stalker Boy while trying to extract myself from the situation.

Blind Date Guy and I finally leave the bar and go to Green Dolphin for dinner. In the middle of dinner the hostess comes over to me and asks if my name is Eileen. It seems I have a phone call. Once I walk over to the host stand to take the call I find I'm talking to Stalker Boy. He just wanted to let me know much he enjoyed meeting me and was checking to see if I had changed my mind about going out with him (during my chit chat with Stalker Boy at Rock Bottom I happened to mention where we were having dinner, so he knew where to find me). Weirdness.

Dinner chugs along. We decide to get an after dinner drink at this place next door to my house. I make a quick stop at the ladies' room since I had broken the seal. As I'm walking to the bathroom door, someone grabs my hand and says "Where you going in such a hurry?" I look up and see...Stalker Boy. Needless to say I skip the potty break, grab Blind Date Boy and break a sprint to the valet. Blind Date Boy wants to confront Stalker Boy, but I recommend against it.

We go to the bar next to my house. It's got a private VIP room on the top floor. We use my card to get in and I make a dash to the ladies room, since I didn't quite make it at the last spot. I get delayed in the potty talking to a friend. When I walk out of the bathroom Blind Date Guy is standing there with a startled look on his face. A little too pale, even for a white guy. It seems he met my friend Michael. Well, during the day he goes by Michael, mild mannered boat salesman. At night he becomes Michelle. Michelle was almost a woman...and loved her new breasts...and was showing them to everyone at the bar. I have seen them a hundred times, as she tended to whip them out every time I saw her. So I guess the whole man with a penis and breasts thing thew him off.

Settling in with a cocktail at the bar, I think we're finally going to get to relax. In walk Big Skinny, Uncle Frank and Simon (names changed to protect me). These guys were good friends of mine, taking me with them to "lunch meetings" in Little Italy about once a week. They wore suits every day but didn't go to an office. They carried guns that I was never supposed to ask about. They took meetings at which I was never to remember the conversations. I had a great deal of respect for these guys and was smart enough to know not to ask any questions. After a little hug hug, kiss kiss, Big Skinny, Uncle Frank and Simon have a chit chat with Blind Date Guy that I didn't get to hear. Lots of whispers. They finish talking and Blind Date Guy grabs me and drags me out of the room, down the stairs and out the front door of the bar. Again, back to that super pale, kinda panicked look on his face. He took one look at me and said, "Do you know who that was? Do you know what they do? Do you know they're in the Mafia?" I put my hand over his mouth and try to stifle the rambling. Of course I knew! I just didn't talk about it. Guess their private conversation centered on a couple of veiled threats centered around what would happen if Blind Date Guy didn't treat me well.

By now I am sure Blind Date Guy had had enough. You'd think this guy would break a sprint for the car, drive away and never look back. You would be wrong. I dated him for years. Even got engaged. And planned (and cancelled the wedding). Twice. Unfortunately, years of my life that I will never get back.