Stalker Boy

Everyone should have a stalker at least once in their lives. More than that you might have to start thinking it's not them...it's you.



Earlier this summer I went on a date with a guy I met on match (surprise!). After sending the requisite email to friends with as much info as I had on him so in case I went missing CSI would have somewhere to start looking, I met him for a drink at Bonefish. He seemed reasonably normal when we met, dressed well, good conversation, well mannered. At the end of the date he said he had to confess a couple things, since I had harped on honesty earlier that night and he wanted to see me again.



As soon as he said this, my first question was "Are you still married?". Of course he was, divorce to be finalized later this year. After that response I had already mentally written him off when he said there was more. Turns out he owns not one, but TWO escort services! And he gave me the website for them! Still not sure if this was as recruiting effort or not, but I digress.



Anyway, after that I definitely decided not to see him again. As soon as I got home I checked out the websites and sure enough, they were for real. He called me 20 minutes after I had left the restaurant to say he had a good time and hoped I would see him again. Too soon, buddy. Much too soon.



When I got up the next morning and had gotten an email from him saying if he didn't hear from me, he would assume I wasn't interested in s second date. I'm thinking this is cool. I won't have to do anything and won't have to hurt his feelings by telling him he's a freak and I wanted nothing to do with him.



That's when it started getting annoying. I knew what his cell number was, so when it showed up on my caller ID, I started ignoring it. He was calling me about 8 times a day, so this became a pain. Then a number shows up on caller ID that is one number up from mine (my cell ends in 3896, this number was the same as mine ending in 3897). I answered it out of sheer curiosity, and it's HIM! One of my super smart girlfriends told me there's a way to change the caller ID so you can pick what shows up. All this by dialing some number before the number you're calling (look it up on the internet...instructions are there somewhere). Anyway, calls started showing up with all kinds of numbers, meaning I wasn't answering anything that wasn't in my phone book.



In all, I was probably getting 8-10 phone calls, voice mails, IMs, texts or emails every day for about two weeks. I didn't respond to a single one, so you'd think the guy could take a hint. After two weeks I finally had to have some of my friends on the Cincinnati Police Dept. step in and have a conversation with the guy. Funny. He doesn't call me any more.

And in case you're wondering, 12 hours with an escort runs $2400 here in Cincy. A relative bargain, I'm sure, compared to other big cities.